


Despair in Life

by Alpha_boss233



Series: Jushtin Prompt Requests [5]
Category: Star vs. The Forces Of Evil
Genre: F/M, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-05-07 09:29:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19206601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alpha_boss233/pseuds/Alpha_boss233
Summary: Prompt: Jushtin’s thoughts on not being heir to the throne during the nine months his mother is pregnant with his sister.I’m super excited for this fic because it is my first Recluza/Jushtin fan fiction, and I think the one of the first one’s to grace Ao3! This is a chapter fic with, you guessed it, nine chapters!





	1. Month 1

Month 1

Jushtin has been Queen for a few months now, working the hardest he had in his life. Trade agreements and peace treaties had left him staying up late and without energy the next day. Of course, no matter how tired he was after he woke up, his duties as Queen had to be completed before he got any extra sleep. 

The physical repercussions were starting to show as well. Bags were under his eyes, growing darker in color and size. His attention span during meetings was starting to dwindle, along with his ability to stay awake.

Crawling into bed was one of the only things on his mind at the moment and couldn’t help but let his mind wander while he went through his night time routine. 

He stood from his desk chair and rubbed the bags under his eyes. Walking up to the vanity he looked up and cringed at what he saw. Starring back at him was the picture of himself but in horrendous form. The bags under his eyes were all but bruised smudges, his skin with turning into a waxy white, and worse of all he was getting stress pimples. 

Sighing in despair he quickly got to work fixing the mess the day had done to his features. He tied his hair back to get the bangs out of his face and sighed when the baby hairs escaped his ponytail. He grabbed his Glycerine Lotion and applied it to his face and hair to help ease his dry skin. He also applied his lip salve before calling it a night and heading for his bed. 

His bed was gigantic, covered in his signature pink and decked out in blankets and pillows. There was enough lace covering the bed that he could swim in it and right now his bed was looking like a cloud of dreams. 

Throwing back the covers, he quickly climbed under the plush comforter and fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. 

Waking up abruptly he saw his mother standing over his bed with a sad smile on her face. She said sweetly, “Jushtin, my sweet baby boy prince, it is with great sadness that I must take from you your Magic Book of Spells and your wand, or Magic Boy-Prince Wand as you call it. You see, soon you will have a sister, and she will be the rightful heir to the Mewni throne.”

Jushtin sat and listened to his mother tell him about the nursemaid’s premonition and how they believed it to be a baby girl. His mind was going numb and all he could think about is how he didn’t work hard enough, didn’t dedicate enough of himself to being Queen and now he was facing the repercussions. 

Eventually he snapped out of his numb state and refocused on what her mother was saying, “Sweetheart, just know that this is for the best of the kingdom. It’s for the best that you be denounced, people just aren’t ready for that type of change yet.”

Jushtin nodded dumbly and reached across his bed to his nightstand. Grasping the wand and spell book in his hands he quickly shoved them into his mothers arms before turning back over in bed. 

He didn’t hear his mother retreating until a few minutes after he gave up his right to rule. He didn’t understand why she would feel sorry for what she did now when a few minutes ago she acted like it was the best idea she’d ever had. 

Jushtin let his tears fall as he realized he would never be Queen in Mewni. It was just like what his mother said, he wasn’t ready to rule.


	2. Month 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jushtin starts getting depressed over his mother’s pregnancy and Recluza visits him.

Month 2

Jushtin got up quietly, no servants had come into his room to wake him for the day. Now days, most of the servants have been attending to his mother as she progressed in her pregnancy. In her second month of pregnancy she was experiencing mood swings and morning sickness that lasted all day. 

Jushtin didn’t really mind that the attention he craved was taken from him after just a few shorts months of his rule. Didn’t care that all he had done to become the perfect Queen for Mewni was gone with the conception of his younger sibling. 

Getting up from bed he shuffled over to his folding screen and quickly slipped on his outfit choice for the day. As he slipped on the clothes he thought to how many outfits, fabrics, and gifts the new Queen would receive upon her birthday. 

Shaking his head, he stormed over to his vanity and started to remove the rag curler from his big curl and lay it on the wood. Jushtin looked into his reflection but quickly averted his eyes. He didn’t want to see the pale complexion he’s required in the last few months, or the bags under his eyes that followed long nights without much sleep.

He stood and quickly walked away from his vanity in order to avoid looking at his reflection. He would cover up his face with makeup, if only it didn’t obscure his clovers.

Walking down the hallway and into the rose garden he felt a small smile light up his face and he sat down on one of the lawn chairs scattered throughout the garden. He closed his eyes and listened to the wind blowing, birds chirping, and the distant chatter of people in the village not too far beyond the castle walls. 

Distantly he remembered that he hadn’t eaten breakfast yet and he had forgotten to eat dinner the night before. Everyone around him could tell he had been losing weight, but he didn’t have anyone’s attention long enough for anyone to go beyond telling him to eat a snack. 

He heard the familiar click of heels but didn’t move an inch until he felt hands over his eyes. 

“Guess who?” A sweet female voice whispered into his ear. He gave a small smirk and visibly relaxed under the hands gently holding his face. 

“Um...Tinbenz?” Jushtin said jokingly to the “mysterious hands”. 

“No you goof it’s me!” The hands were lifted up and Jushtin blinked his eyes to adjust to the light. By the time his eyes had adjusted the owner of the mysterious hands were standing in front of him. 

“Hey Recluza,” Jushtin said with a tired smile. She was wearing a short casual dress and had her black hair tied back. Her skin looked darker, meaning she had probably been off on and adventure without Jushtin and had started tanning. Assessing the woman in front of him he quickly laughed and asked, “Did you go on an adventure without me? Again?”

Recluza huffed, folded her arms, and jutted her chin out as she said, “Well I’m not going to wait for you to get out of whatever this funk of yours is.”  
Jushtin sighed and put his head in his hands as he thought about why he had been she sad lately, so quick to anger and jealous thoughts. His scattered emotions had lead him to become distant with his mom, hardly ever talking to his cru, and him and Recluza are just awkwardly not talking to each other until recently.

Recluza sighed and sat next to Jushtin on the bench. She looked at her hands and then back at the depressed prince and saying, “look, this stuff happens and sometimes you just have to keep walking.”

“I don’t want to keep on walking, I was happy where I was!” Jushtin yelled as he stood abruptly from the bench. He glared down at Recluza but faltered when she stood and glared back harder. 

“Bad stuff happens to all of us, grow up Jushtin!” Recluza screamed at him. He looked down but she could see the anger and jealousy in his eyes. She continued with her rant, “We are royals, nobles who can’t afford to be selfish.”

Jushtin sat back down with a huff and looked back up at Recluza, deciding he’d stay silent through the ordeal. 

Recluza shook her head and walked towards the door of the garden. She would be there for Jushtin, but not close enough to get herself hurt by him. Any person can be a self destructive person, after all. 

“I’ll see you around, Princess. Try not to get yourself too hurt,” Recluza said to Jushtin and she walked out. Glancing out of the corner of her eye she saw his lip twitch in a sorta-smile and smiled slightly herself. 

He would get better soon enough, if she had to drag him out of hell herself, he would get better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys it’s Recluza!! I was so excited to write her! I really wanted to combine a sort of caring but also a sort of stuborn person who doesn’t really like many things. I may write a more detailed description of her later but for now I hope you enjoyed this chapter and have a great day, evening, and night!


	3. Month 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jushtin meets a little girl and works on his parenting/big brother in skills

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is kinda like a side story to go along with the pregnancy angst and shenanigans, I hope y’all enjoy it! Sorry I haven’t updated in a while but I’ll be back to updating regularly after today. (Also be on the lookout for a exciting announcement coming soon)

Jushtin walked around the marketplace looking for gifts that he could give his baby sister. His mother and father had already come up with a name for her, Solaria Butterfly! It was positively adorable and Jushtin wanted to get as many things engraved with her name as possible. 

Many of the villagers looked in shock at the Butterfly Prince walking around. He had been keeping to himself in the castle for so long but decided to get back outside and improve his mental health. As he passed with his guards many villagers bowed in respect, he heard some mothers and fathers explaining to their children who he was. 

Many children have never seen a Butterfly before and were interested in this new breed of people. He felt many tiny eyes watching him and gave some of them a big smile making them giggle in happiness. 

Jushtin stopped by the toy vender to look over the toys he possessed. Jushtin saw stuffed animals, rocking horses, dolls, and a lot of different options for the new Queen. As her surveyed the different children’s toys he caught the eyes of the shopkeeper. 

“Oh, Prince Jushtin, what an amazing surprise to see you here!” The vendor exclaimed in excitement. Jushtin turned and smiled softly at the man as he bowed in respect, Jushtin quickly motioned for him to rise.   
“Why yes, my sister will be born soon and I only want her to have the best,” Jushtin said gently with a kind smile. The shopkeepers heart seemed to melt and he quickly motioned the Butterfly Prince over to the toys. 

As Jushtin looked over the different toys he felt a tug on the side of his outfit and quickly turned to see a little girl clutching her stuffed bear and looking at the prince in curiosity. Jushtin gave her one of his biggest smiles and knelt down in front of her. 

“Why hello there little one! What might your name be?” Jushtin asked her as she giggled in delight at seeing the prince so close to her. 

“Beatrice and this is Bear,” she introduced with a giggle. It wasn’t everyday that a little girl, such as herself, got the meet the prince of Mewni. 

“Well nice to meet you two! You know, I might need your help, I’m going to have a little sister soon and I have no idea what to get her, could you help me?” Jushtin asked her as he sent her puppy-dog eyes. She squealed in delight and took his larger hand in her grasp as she led him through the streets and to different venders. 

The villagers seemed amused at the little girls antics. She dragged Jushtin around the village introducing him to different people and showing him a multitude of options for presents to the new Queen.

Eventually he came up with four stuffed animals, a rocking horse, and a few outfits for Solaria. Jushtin gave the things to one of the guards standing next to him and quickly knelt down to look at Beatrice. 

“Beatrice, you were such a big help today! I would like the formally thank you for all you did for me,” Jushtin announced as he shook Beatrice’s tiny hand. The little girl giggled and rushed to hug Jushtin tightly. He stiffened in surprise for a split second before wrapping the girl into a hug. 

He stood and swung her around before letting her down onto her feet. Ruffling her hair he said his goodbyes before making his way back towards the castle. 

“Prince Jushtin wait!” A voice cried from behind him. He turned abruptly to see a woman in a teachers-uniform running towards him. She stopped in front of him and slowed her breathing before smiling at him and gently saying, “I just wanted to thank you for all you did for Beatrice today.”

“Oh, you must be her mother!” Jushtin said with a huge smile. The lady looked down with a sad expression for lifting her face and looking him in the eyes. 

“No, I run the Mewni Orphanage where little Beatrice stays,” She said in sadness. Jushtin reeled back in shock and glanced between the ground and the lady.

“I didn’t know. Please, if there is anything I can do to help the Orphanage, just let me know,” Jushtin whispered to the teacher. 

She smirked at him and glanced over to Beatrice before turning back and saying, “Well, there is one thing.”


	4. Month 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jushtin confronts Skywynne on why he can’t be Queen

Jushtin walked up to the royal chambers of the King and Queen. Today he had worked up the courage to talk to his mother about Solaria and why he couldn’t be Queen.

In Jushtin’s mind, the whole situation didn’t make sense. Why would they take his crown away? A baby certainly can’t inherit the title of Queen the minute she pops out of the womb. 

Jushtin knocked hesitantly on the door in front of him and stepped back a step. There was the sound of shuffling for a few seconds before the door was thrown open. Skywynne stood in front of the door wearing a bath robe and looking very irritated. She looked around before her eyes landed on Jushtin, this quickly making her posture soften. 

“Hello there, Jushtin. Do you need something?” Skywynne asked kindly with an, obviously faked, smile. It was obvious she was at the point in her pregnancy where she didn’t want to deal with any drama. 

“Well I just wanted to talk with you,” Jushtin answered quietly. Because if he could avoid too much conflict, than he would.

Skywynne stepped out of the way of the door and let Jushtin walk inside. Jushtin walked over to the in-suite dinning table and assisted his mother in sitting down. Once his mother was situated in the chair he took his seat across from her. 

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Skywynne asked her son letting a hint of exasperation leak into her voice. Jushtin straightened in his seat and quickly got to the point of his confrontation.

Jushtin started his little pre-made speech, “Well, I wanted to talk about becoming Queen or even regent while Solaria is growing up.”

Skywynne rolled her eyes and quickly put a stop to Jushtin’s speech, “Jushtin, I can’t allow that. The Magical High Commission has already expressed their views on you becoming Queen.”

“Yes, I know. But I know I can do more for this Kingdom if I was given the opportunity,” Jushtin pleaded with Skywynne. She stood up from the table and turned her back to him. Jushtin continued talking, “Mother just let me prove that I am responsible.”

“It’s because you’re a boy,” Skywynne yelled to her son. Jushtin looked up at his mother abruptly as she continued, “The Commission does not think that a Queen is a good idea.”

Jushtin sat in silence for a little it before softly saying, “so that’s it, I was born the wrong gender and I can’t do anything about it.” 

Skywynne didn’t have the courage to say anything. They both stood there contemplating and thinking over what they had just discussed. Eventually Jushtin just stood up from the table and walked out the door.


	5. Month 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jushtin visits the Orphanage with Recluza

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I haven’t updated in a while, but I’m back at it! Hope y’all enjoy and have an amazing day, evening, and night!

“Jushtin, what are we even going to do here?” Recluza asked in annoyance. She and Jushtin were walking down the road on their way to the Orphanage. As promised, Jushtin was going to visit little Beatrice and the headmistress, Mrs. Joanne. 

“We are going to let them know that we, the Mewni nobility, care about them,” Jushtin said with a huge smile on his face. He was so excited to see the children and their reactions to the Crown Butterfly Prince visiting their home. 

Recluza didn’t even know why she was here in the first place. At one point she was fighting an army of wild boars and then Jushtin was dragging her off to see some little brats. All-in-all Recluza wasn’t a very happy person at the moment. 

Jushtin bounced his way over to the door of the orphanage and knocked three times. He heard a bustling of children on the other side of the door and soon it was thrown open. 

An older woman opened the door and looked at Jushtin and Recluza in shock before she started to stutter, “O-oh, Your Majesties! What a great honor and surprise to see you at our humble orphanage! Please do come in!”

“Why thank you!” Jushtin said in happiness. Both he and Recluza stepped inside of the house and looked around. The orphanage house had toys all over the place and kids running around. 

When they had fully stepped inside they were treated by the same woman who Jushtin met two months ago. She had a baby on her hip and the other woman was ushering the remaining children into the living room. 

“Why hello Prince Jushtin,” The younger woman greeted. The two women introduced themselves as Mrs. Joanne and Miss. Maribowl, the latter being the younger of the two. Soon Recluza and Jushtin had been introduced to all the kids and met all of the children, except one. 

“Where is little Beatrice?” Jushtin asked in curiosity. He looked around the living room but didn’t see the little girl. He heard a little pair of footsteps running down the stairs and quickly found himself holding the little girl in his arms. 

“You came!” Beatrice exclaimed in excitement. Jushtin looked down at her to see a radiant smile on her little face. He smiled at her softly and positioned her better in his arms. She giggled up at him and touched his cheek marks before settling on top of his chest. 

Jushtin looked over at Recluza to see her playing blocks with three other children. He started realizing how well she did with kid’s and smiled softly at her. He and Recluza had known each other for a long time, ever since his first Silver Bell Ball.

It seemed that lately they had grown closer together, hanging outside of when she’d just tag along with Tinbenz. They’d gone on adventures and even just hung out at Butterfly or Spiderbite castle. It was becoming clear to the adults around them that there was something a little more then friendship. 

Jushtin and Recluza played on the floor with the children for hours. While playing with the few toys they hand at the orphanage, Jushtin immediately got an idea.

When they were getting ready to head back to Butterfly Castle towards the end of the night, Jushtin walked up to Mrs. Joanne and said, “Ma’am I would love it if you’d allow me the opportunity to visit once a month and bring new toys for the kids.”

Mrs. Joanne and Miss. Maribowl both looked at each other in shock before the older of the two quickly said, “Of course! I know all the kids were so ecstatic to see royalty in our humble home.”

Jushtin looked around at the house and made a mental note to also ask about helping with renovations. Recluza and Jushtin quickly said their goodbyes and left the Orphanage.

As they were walking back, Jushtin’s mind turned as he thought about the many ways he could help both the Orphans and the people of Mewni.


	6. Month 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gem-Robin attempts to talk with Jushtin about his mom.

Gem-Robin walked down the corridor towards the Rose Garden. His wife had told him about the conversation she had with their son. He didn’t take the news of his wife being so cruel to their son very well. 

A few weeks ago, maybe even a month, they had a big fight and Robin ended up storming out in anger. He couldn’t believe that his wife could be so blind and foolish. Since then, Robin has been sleeping in another room, an empty guest bedroom to be exact. 

He wanted to talk to his son about the conversation Jushtin had with his mother, Robin has unfortunately not been able to. One month ago, Jushtin had taken Recluza to the orphanage and they left to do who-knows-what the next day. 

With all the drama in his life, Robin hasn’t even been able to think much about Solaria. He was so excited to hear the news of a new child running around the house. He loved Jushtin with all his heart, but he also loved children and was excited to hear a new set of feet running around the castle grounds. 

Robin eventually found his way to the Rose Garden and looked around for his son. He went towards the back of the garden and eventually saw his son humming and tending to the blooming roses. 

He hummed a soft lullaby that Robin had never heard before. He walked closer to his son, about to put his hand on Jushtin’s shoulder. All of the sudden, he hears a crunching sound and he quickly freezes as Jushtin spins on his heels. 

He looks at his son in shock and confusion before looking down at his feet and seeing the crushed roses. He felt terrible, his son had taken such good care of his roses and now they were ruined so quickly. 

“Oh I’m so sorry, Jushtin!” Robin said sincerely, giving his son a sad expression. Jushtin looked at his dad’s shocked face before looking down at the roses that were crushed under Robin’s feet. 

Gem-Robin walked off the roses and creased his eyebrows in worry. Jushtin picked up one of the broken flowers and then looked up at Robin’s apologetic expression.   
“Oh it’s quite alright, it’s not like they were something really cool,” Jushtin said with a mischievous smile gracing his features. He stood back up from his haunches and held the rose up before letting it drop to the ground. Jushtin looked at his dad with a soft smile and said, “they are so fragile you know, roses I mean.”

Gem-Robin gave his son a weary smile and gestured to the table planted in the garden’s sitting area. They made their way over and took a seat across from each other. 

The silence was both deafening and extremely awkward for the both of them. Jushtin called on a servant and asked them kindly to bring them tea, hoping that it may cut the tension down slightly. But even with the tea to break the awkwardness, neither Jushtin nor Gem-Robin wanted to talk about Skywynne. 

“Look, Jushtin I know what your mother said was wrong, but you cant ignore her forever!” Robin eventually said to his son. Jushtin looked shocked at his father’s statement. 

Jushtin thought for sure that his father would side with Jushtin in the argument. It was simply horrible to judge someone based upon one’s gender. But it seemed that Gem-Robin was once again playing puppet to the whims of his wife. 

Jushtin quickly stood up from the table and walked towards the castle while sending off a goody bye to his father, “Well, if that’s all you have to say, I’ll be on my way.”

Robin quickly realized his mistake and went to chase Jushtin. He gave up after realizing that Jushtin was mad at his father. The only thing the older man could think to say quickly blurted out of his mouth, “I think you would’ve made a great Queen.”

Jushtin froze when his father said that and stood there for a few seconds before turning his head slightly in his father’s direction and saying, “it’s a little late for that.”


	7. Month 7

Jushtin Butterfly was looking very different today, especially because he was wearing the color black. He was visiting Recluza at the Spiderbite Kingdom and decided to look the part. 

He was carrying a box of treats he cooked for his friend, girlfriend, whatever they were. She had aided him so much this week that he felt it necessary to pay back her kindness and visit the Spiderbite Kingdom. 

Walking up to the gate he flashed a smile at the guards. They quickly recognized him and moved away from the door to let him through. He nodded at them and walked through the gate. 

He made his way to the main center of the castle and looked on in awe at the beauty of it all. Spiderbite Kingdom was quite beautiful with the crystal-looking spiderwebs being strung everywhere.

He was so lost in his admiration of the castle that he didn’t notice Recluza stepping up behind him. She tapped his shoulder and he jumped.

She obviously wasn’t expecting him to jump and flinched back in surprise. He quickly turned around to see who had tapped his shoulder. He saw it was Recluza and let a soft smile cover his features. 

She looked slightly confused at his presence. She was dressed in her more formal wear, all black of course, with her crown on and a few spider bites to accompany her face. 

“Hey, What are you doing here?” Recluza said in confusion. She had every royal visitation time scheduled in her brain and couldn’t recall meeting with the Butterfly’s scheduled today. 

Jushtin snorted to himself when he realized Recluza was checking her internal planner to figure out why he was here today. Distantly, he thought how cute she was when she went over her mental planner. 

Shaking his head, he quickly got to the point, “I’ve brought you some Butterfly treats to say ‘thank you’ for helping me through these past few months.” Jushtin thrusted the box into Recluza’s face and nervously held it there. 

“Oh, uh, thanks?” Recluza said as she cautiously grabbed the box from Jushtin’s hands. He gave her a nervous smile and rubbed the back of his neck. 

She gestured for Jushtin to follow her inside the castle. Jushtin quickly rushed behind her as she quickly walked down the beautiful halls of the palace. The Spiderbite Castle was very beautiful, with pictures covering the walls of the castle. All of them were pictures of the history of the Spiderbite Family. 

Jushtin could really appreciate the beauty of history, he was a very big part of history after all. Before his mother got pregnant, he was in line to become Queen over all of Mewni. Sadly, some things were meant to be. 

Jushtin sighed and looked down at his shoes as they walked towards the Library. Recluza looked back and frowned at Jushtin’s display of depression. She quickly came up with what she was going to say to him and smiled to herself. 

They arrived at the library and they sat down around a table in the very center of the room. Jushtin looked at Recluza and could instantly tell that she had a plan forming in her eyes. 

“Recluza, I know what you’re going to say-“ Jushtin started saying. He was quickly silenced when Recluza interrupted him. 

“No, you’re going to sit and listen to what I have to say,” Recluza said with a smirk on her lips. She adjusted in her seat and began her speech,

“Jushtin, you may have become second in line, but you’re becoming a brother. I know you, you’re going to help raise Solaria, show her what magic is, teach her math, do all the stupid things you love to do. You will never give up on her, just like I won’t give up on you.”

Jushtin looked at her in shock, a plan formed in his mind as he stood up from the table. Maybe his parents didn’t believe in him, but Jushtin believed in Solaria. 

Jushtin quickly rushed out of the Library, before proceeding to run back in a tell Recluza thank you as he kissed her on the cheek. Her face turned bright red and she froze in shock. 

As Jushtin ran out of Spiderbite Kingdom, Recluza rubbed her cooling cheeks and considered what life would be like married to Jushtin.

**Author's Note:**

> I have super exciting new about my fan fiction’s and fanarts that you can check out on Tumblr at fanjunknstuff!
> 
> I hope y’all enjoyed this fic and have a great day, evening, and night!
> 
> (Also I know Recluza wasn’t in this chapter, but check back tomorrow!)


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